Even Better

13 years in! 

I have always become a better person when someone has not liked me. I cannot do right by them. They will never love me. That's something I have had to come to terms with over and over again. 

Sobriety has a lot to do with the terms. What are life's terms and conditions when I am sober? Well, one term is that I do not drink. What I gain from that is a minimal amount of respect that would otherwise in many situations not be there. However, it does not get me much respect from people who do not like me. In fact, it is one of the reasons they don't like me. Are we allowed to say that? Hopefully I don't get flagged for that, or flogged. That is a joke. Yanno.

I have not started drinking. It has been over thirteen years! Incroyable! My entire life has been rebuilt. Almost. Totally. Ask me why I haven't been writing the blog? But it's just that my life had suddenly become so full of everything that was happening that I cannot explain it all. I just thought I would tell you later.

I have still a couple of projects happening. I haven't forgotten them. My time is filled finally. It is time to get rid of the things that are no longer working for me. For instance, I decided to quit learning anything "new". It will be enough to focus on what I know and expand on that. Thankfully, I have already done basically everything I wanted to do so I am still able to expand on a lot of material.

Today I have time to get better at something I was doing before. Even all the little things can still add up. I like it when things add up. Lately there has been plenty of work that I have done personally that has "added up"; I am my own best friend and mentor. Just today a woman I thought was going to help me with something potentially very important suddenly backed out. Why? Is what I am doing and about to do too much? Why not help little old me? Just jokes, I am not old. Yet.

Anyway, I see royalties in my bank from people buying my products on Amazon Kindle, so very grateful for each one. That means, to me, that you are there. At least, and even if I don't know you, or even if I do, you are taking the time out of your life to follow my work and look for what I have done. I am on Tik Tok now as lili@jestnajlepsza. I hope you follow me there and enjoy the little videos I make. It's like this, and all my other outlets, a way to pass the time without drinking and drugging.

I look forward to entertaining you at lili@jestnajlepsza on Tik Tok and if you didn't know, Lisa's Sober Blog as Lisa's Sober Blog is on Facebook too. Although I don't post there as much as I used to.

Thanks for reading.

12+ Years No Booze

 You read that right! 12 years off the sauce. I cannot express my delight and relief of not drinking. Life did not get too mundane to write about. Instead, so much of life just piled up and I could not keep up with it. What with wondering what I should say here or there, or who would even care. But then I have been working on a new website and I see the hits to the old one, and it shows that there is traffic viewing my work from the past 12 years. I have received some royalties from Kindle on the books that I have there. That means to me that my work is not finished quite yet. Like waitaminute! I have a lot of things left to say.

Besides all this, I cannot be the only one that stares at my phone. It keeps me company and what would I know without it. Just kidding a little there, but in all honesty, I did what I needed to do and that was quit drinking. The proof is in the pudding, as they say. I post on social media sometimes. I even opened a Tik Tok account and I have one follower. Sometimes I think about getting serious about posting social media and then I post something and the system shows a lot of viewers but no likes or shares. If I were selling a car, those views (to me) would be considered tire kickers. But anyway, the point is, it takes a lot of diligence and responsibility to stick to posting long term, especially when there is so much competition. Everyone wants to be an influencer, amirite? It is not my goal.

What I want is for people to get sober if they want. My son passed away in the height of addiction. There was much I did not know about him until after he was gone. My niece is hoing through addiction now, she is young and recently told me she had an overdose on fentanyl. Sure, I did drink, I did coke, mushrooms, LSD, weed, E & just off the top of my head, this list, but I think not fentanyl. I do not know this drug, it is beyond my scope. However, that being said, I think it probably comes sometime after drinking alcohol. I have been away from the scene, gratefully, for a long time. But I can see the destruction. I pray I do not find out my niece is deceased. I just do not know how I could handle that. Or she, for that matter, I do not know what goes on in her head. I cannot imagine why she would choose to go down that road after all she knew ahead of time.

For many, the world can be a scary place. One minute, one is surrounded by a sea of faces and the next, one is all alone. The loneliness can take a person out. For all the people on the planet, how a person can be so alone and lonely just blows my mind. Even I, with friends, and family, still walk pretty much alone. It is fine by me, I enjoy being alone, but when I was first quitting drinking it was enough to make me feel sad. Now I can be alone with my thoughts (my phone), and it is peaceful and I can enjoy my life. Although, this is rare, for me to be alone, because like I said, I have family amd friends. But if you see someone struggling and alone, an alcoholic, or if you are one, just know there is help!

When I first quit drinking, I struggled with quitting smoking too. I went to meetings. I went through the 12 Steps more than once. I had sponsors, but none that stuck. I lived in the countryside far away from anyone back then and I did not drive. In fact, I am still using an interlock box on my vehicle. That is supposed to be off soon, this year in 2026. However, iykyk (Smart Start) I will believe this when I see it. To be sure, I do not drink alcohol nor do I smoke cigarettes. I highly recommend quitting both, as I am sure this has been partial lifesaver for me. Every time I drank, I needed a smoke and every time I smoked a cigarette I needed a drink. So, for myself, I had to stop both. I did this with the help of my personal higher power and I also was at Lander Treatment Centre in Claresholm Alberta. 

The people there, and being stripped of my dignity and right to make choices for myself, actually was the beginning of the end for me. Which, in effect, was kind of strange because I lived in a time when the drunk tank was a thing and there were few things less humiliating than that. But that is in the past. Now I just keep going forward one day at a time, hoping for the best. 

10+ Years No Booze (Lost My Son)

I don't drink alcohol. I lost my son to an apparent drug overdose in June last year. He joined the 27 Club. It did not dawn on me to drink by this time. I haven't been drinking in over 10 years. I hated losing my child this way. I still hate it. I am not okay with it. I will never be okay with it. My heart is quite torn up and broken about the death of my firstborn. This does not make me want to drink. I would lose everything, I'm sure. I'd lose my home. I would lose my family.

It's strange you know? One day you're planning your future, trying to figure out how to manage everything that is happening in life, when all of a sudden you get blindsided. At least, this is how it was for me. I just kept on going. It was all a blur. I cried so much. I grieved so hard. I am still grieving. It will never end.

Alcohol could only make things worse. I meant to write here, there were posts I began that were blank. As though the page itself were on hold. As my life shattered and crumbled around me, I grasped on to hold onto some shred of faith, of love, of something at all. I was alone. I thought at some points since my son passed away that I too would surely die. Sadly, it didn't work that way in this case. I just kept waking up day after day.

That is how it is done.

One day at a time.

Never Say Never

I never thought I would see the day I would say I haven't been drunk in more than ten years. Yet, here it is! That day.

Even tho I haven't been drunk in 10 years, I would never say never when it comes to the booze. I have to live today, like the last, knowing that as my strongest weakness. 

I have plenty of weaknesses. Yet none quite so devastating as drinking. 

I Am Still Here

 Here's an update for you:

I am finishing my Bachelor's. I'm on the graduation list this year. It has been a long and difficult road to this. My internal family had grown exponentially over the past 6 years. I lost my bio mom. Two of my siblings passed away. These were not Co-v-id related. 

I'm still writing. You can see and find my books in the shop at www.lisalheureux.com. 

I have the idea for a new book and soon as I can get it on paper it will be available in my store.

We are looking forward to new and exciting prospects this year. There are reels and videos to be made. You can find my personal reels on Facebook. Follow me on social media.

Have a look at my services webpage ad see if there's anything we can do for YOU today.

 

Not-So-Mocktail

 Let's have a look at what happens when a sober alcoholic accidentally sips a cocktail. It happened to me. Yes. I met my friend for lunch. When I ordered my drink, I asked the waitress if they had mocktails. She seemed confused for a moment but right before I was going to say something like a Shirley Temple, she said Caesar and I exclaimed yes, because I usually have a VIRGIN Caesar. I stated that I am sober, and my friend said to the waitress that I don't drink.

Well, the waitress brought me a caesar and I smelled it, like I always smell my drinks when I eat at a restaurant or pub. It passed the odor test and I took a sip. It was super spicy and that was all I could tell at first. They made it with tomato juice and (I think) Tabasco sauce in a glass that had been dipped in spice, salt and pepper. I noted there wasn't a pickled veggie in it, like many establishments will have, but other than that, I licked the spice off the glass and had another couple of sips. It tasted fine and not particularly unusual until all of a sudden there was the faintest old familiar taste. Like what I imagined vodka tastes like. I had not had a drink of vodka in almost nine years up until then.

I immediately said to my friend, can you smell vodka in this? I handed her the glass. She took a big whiff and said No, why? does it taste like vodka? I said, well now, maybe not, I did say mocktail. My friend says, you didn't say virgin. You're right, I said. I took another tentative sip, trusting in what I believed was a mocktail. I was very hungry and thirsty. I laughed then. No. I pushed the drink away. There is vodka in there. Just then, the waitress walked by. My friend asked her if there is vodka in my drink. The waitress answered enthusiastically, Yeah! Do you want a double? I laughed and exclaimed No thank you! I'm sober. I haven't drank in eight years! I laughed again and said, Except for that. 

The waitress apologized and said she should have known when I said mocktail and my friend said didn't say virgin, I had to agree that I had not specifically said the word virgin. The waitress brought me a pop to drink then. I have to say I was a little shocked at how weak the drink was that I didn't even notice it. Shocked that my sniff test was not a reliable test! But I went on to eat my lunch and my friend and I had a good conversation. At some point, I laughed and told my friend how I had just come from a check-up and insisted to the Dr that I don't drink. Then I promptly drove over and met my friend and drank.

Maybe upon reading this it sounds like I laughed a lot at this but I did and continue to take it seriously. I quit drinking when I knew it was an alcoholic beverage. Come to think of it, the remainder of the drink was on the table the entire meal and I never looked at it again. What little aftertaste there was, just tasted gross and sickly to me, it was not appealing. I remain sober and the urge to drink/get drunk is still removed from me. For that, I am grateful.

Earlier in the day, I had been angry. I had been late to the Dr. There was no parking. It was difficult to get out of the parking lot due to paving. Late in the evening, when everyone is asleep, I have to admit, the incident with the drink was rather humbling. It makes me think of all I would lose had I been failed in this test. But the grace that has kept me off the booze for almost nine years was sufficient to keep me sober for another day. 

I am uplifted by this truly amazing and on the other hand rather embarrassing experience. It is a good lesson for me. To remain diligent. To be more fearful of my kryptonite.

8 Years No Booze

One crisp winter night I was walking "across the tracks" to a place I used to go and visit sometimes when I was binge drinking in North Battleford, Saskatchewan. As I walked, I slipped on the ice and fell flat on my back in the alley. As I lay there staring straight up into the chilly atmosphere, I could see that the sky was filled with brightly glittering stars. To the left, the huge spotlight that shines out from the Gold Eagle Casino was flashing around in circles like it did in those days. Tears of pain and frustration welled up in my eyes and I cried out to God as I surely had times before. (I had been drinking and apparently slipping and falling on the ice in an alley was the last straw that day.) Even though it was probably close to seven years and many petitions of the same stripe later, I do find myself today without the urge to drink, drug or smoke. It has been eight years. In fact, I was able to quit drinking coffee and caffeinated teas by the same power. And that Being, that Abstract Entity that I have been crying out to my whole life, that is God to me. My Maker.

 

 

 

Pre-pandemic, I had been anticipating an upcoming global poverty fundraiser slash awareness party. The important selling points to other would-be-party-goers were the two cash bars. For me, two cash bars meant two good reasons for me to have a party plan. When I quit drinking, I had to plan out much of my day-to-day activities. Especially parties! I must not go hungry or thirsty. I still keep a plan of several ways out in case of an alcoholic emergency, which I think I personally have never had since I quit drinking. Although I do not have urges to drink ever, I can NEVER take that for granted. Sometimes a pocket candy will suffice. Perhaps a safe alcohol free person to call in case I suddenly want to drink. I am pretty sure I am on guard from alcohol today about the same as I was when I first quit eight years ago.

 

 

I remain happy to be here writing about one of my all-time favorite topics! Freedom from Alcohol and Drug Addiction. I want everyone to be left with valuable “Sober Li” info on how to get healthier, have a better personal life, and make more money and, of course, possibly get and remain booze free, when they finish reading my blogs. 

 

Anyone can find out more about me on social media. I have active Twitter, Instagram and Facebook accounts. I still write at Lisa's Sober Blog. I own Lisa’s e-Store and More, an online gift shop. One of my followers once wrote a wonderful testimonial that goes like this:

 

“Lisa, I was really moved by what I have read and felt deeply about the abuses you have been through. I still cannot get my head around the 10 relationships filled with abuse! No one should go through that.

 

I really feel so sorry for you for having had to grow up like that and equally relieved to learn that you pulled through it all and have come out on top. Like you, I abhor any form of abuse against women and children. Being married with two beautiful kids, I understand how one would feel if such abuses were done to my daughter or wife. 

What I don't understand is how you've survived so long and make a very strong comeback! That feat is truly remarkable! I fully support your cause. 

Keep up the good fight and continue to stay clear headed. I feel your pride in your accomplishments through your story and I really really am happy for you. Please continue to stay strong as you're a big inspiration for many.”

 -RJFOSTER

 

 

First of all, Maslow's hierarchy of needs; when I was drinking and drugging, I wasn’t getting my basic needs of food, water, warmth, rest, security, and safety. Once these needs were met after I quit using alcohol to make my problems worse, I was able to move on. I could start thinking about my relationships. Some unhealthy relationships had to end. Some relationships needed work. Some relationships needed a break to consider things. After a while, I was even ready to start new relationships. While this was going on, I wrote some books. I trained to be a Peer Support Worker. Now I'm taking university courses to get a Bachelor's Degree.

Thanks for reading.
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While you are here,

Lisa L'Heureux is the author of 7 books. Her work includes the Lisa's Sober Blog Series, This and the Man in the Moon and This One is About Domestic Violence. She lives in Alberta, Canada, with her family.

​More than 8 years ago, Lisa retired from practicing alcoholism.

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