One Day At A Time

One day at a time. What does that mean really?

When I went to the treatment centre in 2013, it was the all-time low of my life. Believe me! I've been low before. Nothing compared to this.

While I was there, I remembered various comments in various rooms where the phrase "one day at a time" was written on the walls. I did not know what that meant. It wasn't as though you could do more that one day at once!

My life was in a shambles at the time, I was sick, I couldn't stand another drink. 

This simple phrase I contemplated daily because once I got home, I could not handle one day at a time. It was impossible. In fact, in those days, I sometimes could only do one minute at a time. Chaos prevailed. Depression was rampant.

I think after a while, either life changed, or else I got used to the mess. I got right to work, ironing out the mess that Drunk Lisa had left behind. If you had seen Drunk Lisa you would understand why I talk about myself as though I were another person back then! It's a joke but it's not. I know it was drunk me that did all those things.

So there I was, newly sober. I attended meetings back then. I still do today. I talk to other sober drunks. Every day, and I think I do this everyday litrally, I consider my life as a drunk. I consider my life while I am now sober. There's much I do today that I would have never been doing if I was drunk. 

I spent a good while apologizing. 

Now we know we cannot live more than one day at a time. However, do we know that in essence, thinking about tomorrow helps but it cannot change anything in the present moment? One day at a time also means to be present. Not dwelling in the past we can't do anything about.

One day at a time means that I have been given one day of reprieve from the incessant urge. The urge that would never let me rest. Today I am grateful. Today I can do the thing I could never do while I was a practicing drunk.

One day at time means today I add on the the length of days I have in sobriety. 

It means that today I may die. But I won't die drunk today.

Thanks for reading.
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